Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Galations 6:9

I must make a confession to begin with. This past weekend was very busy and hectic. Saturday night rolled around and I was so exhausted that I decided that I'd get up early Sunday morning to plan my children's church lesson (which I never do)because I was just running on fumes at this point. Well, anyone who knows me should know that I have trouble getting up early (my friend Hannah can attest to this as she and her family came for a visit and had to come into my room to cut my alarm off because I was sleeping clear through it. Sorry Hannah, Jason, Mollie and Miles:) Thus I say that to let you know that I seriously overslept Sunday morning. So I am running out the door with nothing planned for the kiddos at church. I just grabbed a children's devotional that I have once I got there I just decided to go on what ever page I opened the book to. Again, I never do this...and I am mortified to admit that I did this on this past Sunday. Please rest assured that I do take more care and consideration normally when planning a lesson for our children's church program. So please Pastor, don't fire me:) However, the lesson was on not quitting. The bible verse that it was based on was Galations 6:9 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." I was very struck by this as the past week was very difficult for us in our adoption. There have been many times that I get frazzled and just want to throw in the towel (and unless you have been down the road of adoption, I'd imagine this is difficult to understand). I almost think that the Lord needed me to get that scripture more than the kids in church.

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

I never imagined that this would be so tough

We did recieve an unofficial referral Friday. We we very excited at first, however, we began to have a nagging feeling that it just wasn't right. We had until this morning to either accept and see if we could move forward or to decline. We spend the entire weekend in prayer and seeking the Lord's guidance. We spoke to an international adoption specialist, and a pediatrician here. Neither gave us anything over concerning medical wise. Family and friends were all in support and very excited. Still something was just nagging us that this isn't what the Lord is calling us to do. In this situation, we have been in this process for so long it seems and we are beyond ready for something to happen. Emotions are at an all time high. However, we have to make sure that we are not making this decision on what we want because we are growing impatient. We have to make sure that we are still focusing on the Lord and his will...not just our own desires. We had, as of yesterday, pretty much decided to pursue these children regardless of any of our concerns. Even though our minds were there, our hearts just weren't feeling that it is what we were supposed to do. Last night, we were finally able to look at each other and both say that we just had this gut feeling that this is not the path we are supposed to take. As horrible as it may sound, there was an overwhelming sense of peace once we came to that realization, whereas there was no sense of peace when we were of the thought we were going to do this.
At the end of my life, I want nothing more than to hear the words "Well done my good and faithful servant"....I do not want to hear, "You did try to follow me but you still did the things that you wanted to do without hearing me first". It is our prayer that the next referral that we get (and hopefully it will be soon), we will see the pictures and the Lord speaks to us so strongly in knowing that baby/babies are ours. So for now, we continue to wait and seek the Lord.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Father's Day

So Father's Day is fast approaching. Again, I am a few days early but this is the only day that I have to where I can get to a computer before Father's Day. I have a few Father's Day thank you's to give.

To my daddy:

Thank you for being the best daddy that a girl could ask for. You have taught me so much about life and you have pushed me to be the very best person that I can be. One of the biggest gifts that you have given me is your love for your family. You love times when we are all together and you make those moments as often as you can.

Thank you so much for enforcing a good work ethic and independence on us. You have always lived by the saying "Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you have fed him for a lifetime." You have taught me to "fish" very well. Thank you for always requiring me to work. You never a once let any of us sit back and have a "free ride" so to speak. Thus, you have 3 hard working kids today don't go looking for hand outs, but rather try to hand out to others. Thank you for teaching us to not be burdens on others or to wait on others to do for us. (This all may not make much sense to some but I feel sure that my daddy will know exactly what I am getting at here.)

You raised us all to be financially independent. You have taught me so much about financial security. Now there are some lessons that I will not carry out, I can assure you I will NEVER put water in the ketchup bottle to stretch it, HA! You are extremely financially wise and I hope that I will carry that wisdom with me for the rest of my life.

You have always taught us to work hard and give everything that we do 100%. I am blessed to have parents who have taught me so much about life and how to work. Y'all taught me to cook and clean, you made sure that we knew how to grow our own garden, can our own produce, we can make our own jellies, get up cows, fix fences, and heck...I can even bush hog a field on my own (even though you fight me over who gets to use the tractor. HA!).

Thank you for always being there for us. No matter what we are doing in life, you are always right there pitching in, in any way that you can. You are there with me in everything I do for Kid's Camp, you are right with us when we do catering jobs, you keep our adoption account and the finances there, you have even helped me pipe buttercream roses once when I had so many to do. Thank you for being such a great daddy...there is not a better one out there. I love ya!

What a sweet moment

We had Kid's Camp at our church earlier this week. It is a long yet very rewarding couple of days. The last night I was doing the closing and thanking everyone for all their hard work and help with helping make our Kid's Camp so awesome. At the end, Pastor Addison asked Benji and I to come to the front and he wanted to take a minute to thank us for all of our hard work. He went on to tell the kids (and the rest of the congregation, which had several people that don't attend our church) about our adoption. He told them that it was taking a good bit longer then we had hoped. Then he asked all the kids to come up front and gather around us and say a prayer for our adoption. Pastor Addison prayed the sweetest prayer over us and we were surrounded by all the children from Kid's Camp, many of them with their arms around us. It was such a sweet moment for Benji and I. It was a very touching moment for us and it was the perfect ending for such a good week at camp.

Sunday, June 13, 2010

My apologies to the world

I have the best BFF in the world...so sorry world, you may think that your BFF is the best one out there, but she's not because I have the best:)
I got home Friday to a package by my back door. In it were the cutest monogrammed zebra striped burp cloths (she knows me quite well), with a sweet note from my dear BFF that said "Now you will be one chic mama!" This is not the first of little "packages of sunshine" (in her words) that she has sent for out little one. My BFF has been one of the most amazing supporters of our adoption ever! She has been there with me every step of the way physically, emotionally and spiritually. She is just the best and I love her so very much! Thank you so much Ashley for your constant support, you will never know how much it means to me.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

The Lord is so good!

A while back I had mentioned a grant that Benji and I applied for. Well....they called today and they are giving us a grant!! We are just beyond thrilled! I don't think that they would mind me saying this here, but Reaching Hands is amazing. They have such a heart for adoption and they are and have been a major blessing in our lives. Thank you Lord for the Reaching Hands Ministry! They are a wonderful group with such wonderful hearts.